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Here at the Sickos Committee, we really love the Old-Timey newspaper headlines from college football games from the 1920s and earlier. We wanted to do a weekly recap of some randomly decided games in this Old-Timey style of writing for the fun of it. Just try to imagine an old-school news reporter reading this aloud to you on an old transistor radio. Also, we go really heavy on the alliteration.

How do we decide which games we do? Well, if you are declared the Sickos Committee Game of the Week, you get one automatically no matter what happens. However, the others are randomly decided by the committee writing staff; it could be the normal headliner game of the week or some random FCS game we got drawn in by and just wanted to write about because we found it compelling. We typically do about three to six games a week.

Here are the Headlines for Week 12

November 15, 2025 - East Lansing, MI

The promise of this Penn State season shriveled suddenly after squandering a supreme opportunity to overtake Oregon three or four fortnights ago. The Nittany Lions have had nil in the win column since that woeful white-out night. Their opponents, Michigan State, were sliding the same way and were losers of six straight, just like Penn State. Both rivals reunited in the East Lansing afternoon to brawl for a timeless trophy known as the Land Grant. The trophy, adorned with so many knickknacks that you’d find on your general store’s shelves, weighs in at a stout 76 pounds. The Spartans struck first on their first play from scrimmage as Elijah Tau-Tolliver saw the seam in the Penn State defensive line and sprinted 57 yards for seven. Penn State answered with a 12-play stride down the surface to set the scoreboard at sevens. The Spartans found a field goal in the second quarter for a short-lived supremacy. Then Penn State asked, Was the Grunk there? And he was, as Ethan Grunkemeyer connected on a short pass to Devonte Ross, who raucously ran right down Broadway for seventy-five yards and a 14-10 lead. The two teams began to battle Big Ten style for the rest of the half and the entire third quarter. Punt after punt after punt after punt, pounded the playing surface, and the two teams tangled in a prolonged field position fracas. The Spartan students seemingly saluted the punting prowess by removing their upper body garments and then waving them wondrously in a circular manner above their craniums. In the final frame, Penn State slugged, slammed, and smashed through the Spartans defense, hoping they’d break so they could seal the game. The Nittany Lions traversed the Spartans grass and embarked on a 13-play, 76-yard safari, finding a touchdown with a little over 4 minutes remaining in the contest and taking a two-possession priority. Penn State tacked on another late score after a Spartan slip-up with the sphere. The Nittany Lions loudly lifted the lovely Land Grant Trophy and left East Lansing to take the trophy back to Happy Valley with their slim bowl hopes still alive. 

Penn State 28 - Michigan State 10 

November 15, 2025 - Athens, GA

Modern college football has benefited from new faces in new places. The University of Texas at Austin, the Longhorns, joined the Southeastern Conference in 2024 and immediately made noise in the league. Vying for the conference title, the team was met with resistance from one of the stalwarts of the South in football, the University of Georgia. Since joining this game will represent the third time these two will try to top one another on the field. The game began with a field goal from the Longhorns, but the Dawgs responded with a touchdown. This would represent the only lead change of the night. The home team got another touchdown on their second drive and forced an interception from the Horns in the first half. The rest of the drives before the break for each team ended in punts; the final drive from the Longhorns ended the half. In the second, the teams trade points, and then disaster strikes the silver-britches-wearing cohort, as their drive ends in an interception. The Horns take the ball the other way for their only touchdown of the contest. From there it was all Bulldogs, as they scored on their ensuing drive and immediately recovered an onside kick! The onside took the Horns by surprise and led to another touchdown for the home team. The Texas Varsity never came close to scoring again and allowed a fifth touchdown to the Dawgs. 

Georgia 35 - Texas 10

November 15, 2025 - Annapolis, MD

Teams have run some version of the triple option for many decades. The Naval Academy Midshipmen have made it their mission to perfect the offense and have come as close as any team. Their opponents this week, the University of South Florida Bulls, run a version of this, usually from the shotgun formation. The game featured explosive plays, big runs, and scoring from start to finish. The first drive was a punt from the Bulls, and that was one of the few of the day. From there the teams scored all through the first half; Navy got a touchdown, and the Bulls responded with a field goal. After a Navy fumble and a Bulls stalled drive, the teams trade touchdowns. Navy then pressed the visitors, scoring again and getting an interception that the Midshipmen converted into a field goal. With a drive stopped on downs, the Bulls give it back and end the half with no other scores. In the second half the fireworks went off without end, and each team scored on six consecutive drives: Navy had two touchdowns and a field goal, and South Florida had three touchdowns. After stopping the Mids on downs, South Florida tried the ‘ole “Pitchy-Pitchy Woo Woo.” The play ended on a fumble recovered by Navy.

Navy 41 - South Florida 38

November 13, 2025 - Durham, NC

Within the ranks of the Historically Black Colleges and Universities (HBCUs), North Carolina Central University and South Carolina State University represent two of the best in the sport. Each winning a Black National Championship in the past five seasons. The teams this season continue their streak of good teams, entering this game undefeated in conference. Each seeking the top of the Mid-Eastern Athletic Conference fast lane. The teams did not disappoint as a track meet began, and the teams ran up and down the field, scoring at will and pushing each team to the brink. The first half saw five consecutive drives ending in a score. After the exchange, the Bulldogs from SC State had a 17-6 lead. Before the end of the half, the Eagles get a touchdown. At the break, the NCCU “Sound Machine” and the SC State “Marching 101” shook the very foundations of the stadium they were in for the fans. When the second half kicked off, the teams returned to the scoring; the Bulldogs scored a field goal and the Eagles a touchdown. Disaster strikes as SC State fumbles the ball away, but the Eagles don’t capitalize and punt. With a stop on downs, SC State gives the ball back again, but the Eagles are forced to punt once more. The Bulldogs finally break the stalemate with a touchdown. But the last gasp of the Eagles ended on downs, and the Bulldogs wound the clock down to zero. 

SC State 34 - NC Central 24

November 15, 2025 - Cambridge, Massachusetts

Harvard hosted Penn in a captivating contest that came down to the dying, dramatic, dwindling seconds. Penn promptly pounced and produced points on their first four possessions. The Quaker quarterback, Liam O’Brien, orchestrated an offensive onslaught, utilizing his legs liberally and locating receivers with remarkable regularity. But Jaden Craig, Harvard’s senior signal-caller, craftily carved up Penn’s defense when it mattered most, including a sneaky scoring scramble into the end zone on fourth down to take the teams into the tunnels with Penn prevailing 27-21. The second half spawned a scoring surge. Harvard hammered home a heroic heave to Brady Blackburn in the end zone, catapulting the Crimson to their first lead, 28-27. Two minutes later, Craig connected with his tight end, Ryan Osborne, who cantered down the course for an 82-yard catch and catapulted the lead to 35-27. Penn persistently pushed back. Jared Richardson reeled in his third touchdown reception, taking his total to 12 on the season, and the two teams traded touchdowns until the score tallied up to 40-42, a convenient but not quite comfortable cushion for the Cambridge Crimson. With 22 seconds showing on the scoreboard, Penn’s placekicker planted a pivotal 30-yard field goal and gave the Quakers a precarious 43-42 advantage, seeming to seal Harvard’s fate. The stadium stood silent…stunned. The Crimson QB coolly commandeered one final frantic foray. Three tremendous throws to receivers rocketed Harvard into Penn territory, positioning Kieran Corr for his moment of magnificence. With Harvard Stadium hushed in horrified hope, Corr’s kick climbed skyward from 53 yards away and sailed successfully straight through the sticks as time ticked to triple zeroes. The Crimson crowd erupted in ecstatic, ear-splitting exultation. The heroic Harvardmen hold a share of the Ivy League title and head to Connecticut to compete against Yale for the conference’s first-ever automatic qualifier in the FCS playoffs.

Harvard 45 - Penn 43

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